Me * 1986 Growing up I was a bit of a tom-boy. My parents signed me up for different sports leagues. I played t-ball, soccer, softball, basketball, and volleyball. When I was younger there wasn’t teams for girls like there are today. I played on all-boy soccer teams, and all boy t-ball teams. As I got older, there was all-girl softball and basketball teams. And, I played volleyball (and softball, and basketball) with the other young women (girls age 12-18) at church. I feel like I learned a lot by playing organized sports. I learned commitment to a team, and being there always, no matter what. I’m hoping that my kids will learn some of these same things while they are playing sports (or choir, band or art classes if they choose) too.
I remember one cloudy Saturday, two teams took the field to play a game of soccer. The kids on the team were all about 7-8 years old. And all boys. Except one girl with brown, curly hair. Me. As the teams ran up and down the field, one boy approached me and said, "How does it feel playing with all boys?"
I remember being so annoyed that he didn’t think that I was as good because I was a girl. Later on in the game, I took the ball from this same kid. Then I asked him, "How does it feel to have the ball taken by a girl?" I was so proud of myself.
Back then, they kept score. There was always a winner and a loser. This is where I learned how to lose. It’s also where I learned how to win. In the league that my kids play in, they don’t keep score. I think this is good for the first couple of years, but eventually I think the score needs to be kept. Players need to learn how to win, and how to lose. Players need to know what sportsmanship is. And, all the players are keeping score, even if no one else is. Even the little five-year-olds.
I’m a little more girly now. There was no pink in my closet back then. As I write this, I’m wearing a brown skirt, and a pink shirt. But you know what? I still love to play sports. I played all through high school. After high school I played on work teams. After I was married I played with the church women’s group. It gives me such a feeling a comradery, being on a team. I love the adrenalin pumping through my veins, and the feel of my muscles working hard.
Now with children, I get to play soccer and baseball in the front yard. I get to watch my kids being part of a team.
One of my favorite things then was having my parents come to watch my play at every game. I don’t remember how many games we won or lost. I do remember being a part of a team, and all the things that I learned from the experience.
And I hope that I can teach my kids all the things that I learned, because my parents were good enough to put me in organized sports.
Do your kids play sports? Do you? Did you growing up? What did you learn?
8 comments:
I never really played sports growing up. I do remember playing soccer for one summer season --I think I was 6. I was the best goalie they had, and I decided I didn't want to be a goalie anymore when I took a ball to the face. Ouch!
After that, the only other really athletic stint I had was the 8th grade Track team. And marching band (many may mock, but until you try it, you have no idea!). But it's funny you mention winning/losing, commitment, etc. because that's exactly what I learned by being in Marching Band, Choir, Piano competitions, Drama, etc. We would practice like crazy, and then lose to a better choir. Or marching band. Or pianist. It was tough.
Anyway, we put #1 in gymnastics and than Little League and she liked both well enough. This fall, though, we're putting her into an Art School. She's got the drawing talent! #2 wants to dance.
P.S. I agree with you about keeping score. What is up with protecting our children from the sad side of life?! Where else will they learn? I'd rather they learn when they are young and in a safe and non-threatening environment, you know?
P.P.S. Your picture is adorable. I love it. :)
I love your thoughts about this. I played a few sports growing up, but not much -- my family didn't have the money to get too into anything. But I played soccer on a co-ed team and I was the goalie for one of our games. I was decent and blocked most of the attempts. I let one get through and we ended up losing. I still remember the mean way I was treated for letting that get by. It was frustrating and embarrassing, but I am not sad I participated. It's good to see how others depend on you. And it's also good to realize that sometimes you make mistakes and things get by you -- you just have to take the lumps and move on.
In high school I ran track. It was not really about teamwork and as a result I think I was pretty lazy about it. I loved it, though. Especially the aching muscles after a day spent really practicing.
I really do wish I had played more organized sports -- I don't know the rules of most games well enough to feel confident playing them -- like church basketball for example. I would love to be capable of playing on those teams, but I totally fear being the absolute, utter weak link. Not just for my lack of ability, but for my lack of knowledge, too. One church sport I LOVE to play is softball. That's probably my favorite sport to play, and you know what? I'm pretty good at it. That's satisfying -- even when we lose a game. I think the losing is as important as the winning and I really do want my kids to have those experiences. Chloe is in ballet and likes it. She's really gifted in it, which is gratifying as a parent, but I don't
want my kids to be overinvolved in sports or dance (or any other activity, for that matter), though. I really think for my kids it will be important for them to just have time to be kids and unsupervised in their activities.
My other 2 are too little to be involved in anything just yet, but it will get crazy once all of them are involved in things. I want to prolong the onset of that misery as long as I can!
This is a super-long comment! Sorry! You just set off a whole chain of thoughts with that post, though!
And I bet it felt so good to steal the ball from that little punk!
Sounds like you had some wonderful experiences.
I was such a sports goober that the one basket I made while playing city league basketball was for the other team!!!!
Cheryl is right...marching band is WAY harder than you would think it is! I did that for 3 years in high school. Growing up I played t-ball, then baseball. I also took dance, gymnastics, and swimming lessons. I played volleyball and basketball in school and at church (when the school sports were done, because they won't let you do both at the same time). Then in college I played soccer for a while too. I think they were great...the physical activity is very important and the sports helped me become much more coordinated. The individual sports (gymnastics and dance to a point) taught me how to be confident in myself and the team sports taught me how to work, er, on a team and with other people. I also learned how to be a good sport too...there was always someone who won and someone who lost and I learned how to be good at both. I have always wanted my kids to learn that sort of thing too...so the boy does gymnastics, baseball, and swimming and the daughter does gymnastics, dance, and swimming (she wants to do t-ball so bad, but she is only 3 1/2). I want them to learn to win, learn to lose, and learn to have fun.
I played a little soccer in my early elementary grades, but sports were never my thing, way too uncoordinated for that, and a little too insecure to try anything new when I was a kid.
My boys aren't the least bit athletic. They have a lot of great qualities and talents, but catching a ball isn't one of them. lol So my sport experiences have been few and painful. We did just finish a soccer season that was the most positive sports experience ever. It is a goofy league where the parents aren't allowed to cheer, you don't keep score and no sentence can be spoken that doesn't begin with "Good!" or "Great!" It's really kind of funny (and a little horrifying), you have to sign a document agreeing to the crazy rules and everything.
It's sad the kids don't get the opportunity to learn all the sportsmanship things you talked about. But at the same time, it isn't the kids who are the bad sports, it's the crazy parents. So where was the learning when those parents were kids? A league with the kinds of strict rules we had is obviously for the remedial sports kids who can't cut it in a truly competitive league. The main reason it was the perfect season for us! :)
I think I may have taken a few dance classes, but we never really played sports. Instead, we'd take off and roam the canyons across from our home on our bikes. I guess instead of team-players we learned to be independent souls. There's something to be said for both ways I guess.
My girls do sports though. Soccer, basketball and of course martial arts.
Different times, different area of the country...
When the darling picture of you was taken, I already had a two year old! YIKES. I loved sports, was totally a tomboy, loved to climb trees and make forts. For girls WA BACK THEN you could only do organized sports at school. I was so good (I thought) and so into basketball...until everyone else kept getting taller & I stayed the same size. I totally loved softball and played on the school team (basketball too). I would have LOVED to be a soccer player, but we only got to do it for PE.
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